Submitting frenzy

I just re-submitted 7 stories to various markets this morning. I have 2 that I’ll send tomorrow (the markets don’t open until June 1). I have 2 left in inventory that I can’t find a home for at the moment, but I’ll keep looking. I have 4 stories that are nearly ready to send out for the first time once I finish revising them, which I hope will happen this week.

To quote Rayman Raving Rabbids, “DAAAAAAAAAAAH!”

Not fair!

Everyone else who got the con crud at WisCon is saying, “It’s only a minor cold, not a big deal.”

I haven’t been this sick since norovirus. Now my voice loss is total, and I’m coughing up all sorts of crap and sleeping most of the day. I woke up in the middle of the night feeling like a very small brick had lodged itself in my sinuses.

Not that I want anyone else to be sick too, but this sucks!

In other news of whining, I may have to take a sledgehammer to the laundry room. It’s not like the machines ever work anyway.

Home from WisCon

A fantastic con, as always. I’m home now and I’ve got con crud. It’s a nasty cough, sore throat, and near-total laryngitis. I’m prone to losing my voice. It happens once every 2-3 years or so. It always feels weird to me when I can type but not talk.

Beats the hell out of norovirus, though.

Hello to everyone I met this year!

WisCon panels

Fri 9 AM -12 PM Writers’ Workshop

Sat 11:30 AM – 1 PM Journeyman Writers’ Discussion

Sat 4 PM – 5:30 PM Taboo 2: Electric Bugaloo

Sun 2:30 PM – 4 PM Young Writer Q&A

Mon 10 AM – 11:30 AM Getting It Wrong Gracefully

WisCon reading

I’ll be reading in Taboo 2: Electric Bugaloo. It’s the sequel to last year’s Taboo reading. We’ll read our edgiest work and won’t pull any punches. The readers are myself, Ted Kosmatka, Rachel Swirsky, and Jennifer Pelland. Last year, we made the audience cringe–but everyone stayed to hear more. Stories involved worshipping feces, kissing dead dogs, and other taboo topics.

Taboo 2 will be from 4:00-5:30 PM on Saturday in Conference Room 2. We’ll be raffling off prizes again. Come hear what our new Taboos are.

I’ll be reading “Fulgurite,” which is published in the brand-new Sybil’s Garage #6.

Here’s the opening paragraph.

Fulgurite
by Vylar Kaftan

JULY 11

I will be struck by lightning on July 13. I know this because I saw a unicorn in the desert sky earlier tonight. Its cockroach body and feathered wings cast shadows on the ground. Lightning forked from its horn, like decisions in my life. Decision to move to Phoenix: fork. Decision to finish my degree: fork. Decision to date Maddoc: fork. All the lives I rejected flash across the sky and are gone, except the one that will strike me. In two days, on a Thursday. Thursday the Thirteenth.

You’ll hear the whole story at the reading.

16 horrific human growths

The 16 most horrific human growths of all time.

Work-safe, but not for the faint of heart. Seriously. I warned you.

And it’s further proof that I’m only squeamish about movies/motion. Still photos are pretty much fine, even when they’re gross. I feel sympathy for some of these people, especially the ones who can’t afford surgery.

I think the pine tree inside the guy’s lung is the one that freaked me out the most.

An attempt at the most boring post ever

In 2007, I bought two plain t-shirts at JC Penney’s, where I never shop. I just needed new clothes for a trip and the store was convenient.

Last year, I got notice of a class action lawsuit. Penney’s had done… something. I ignored it.

Last week, I got a card in the mail that gave me $10 off a $10 purchase as settlement for the lawsuit. Basically, something free from Penney’s. Well, okay then. I went to the store and tried on some stuff. Nothing fit or looked good.

So I went back to the same rack where I bought two t-shirts before, and bought two more t-shirts of the same brand and style. In different colors. Total cost: $2.18.

This post has no point. And I think I’m the kind of customer JC Penney’s would like to see spontaneously combust.